For two racing seasons now, I just haven’t been able to get my butt in gear or complete a race.  To be fair, the local 50k I like to do each year (Dirty 30) was going to be a solid day and a pretty big PR for me last summer, but my running partner was seriously ill, and it was unsafe to leave her on the course, so we ended up with DNFs for both of us.  I was pissed at first, but proud of her for recognizing that it was unsafe to continue.  I just wish she hadn’t tried to run in the first place that day, since this was not an out-of-the-blue problem.  That one was out of my hands.  But it seemed to start a downward spiral in training and racing that I have only just started to climb out of, and it’s frustrating.  Also, to be fair, I’m in the final stages of my Ph.D. (defending this spring!), and that takes quite a toll on the physical and mental energy reserves.  But working out is also fabulous for my physical and mental health, and I needed to stop making excuses and just get it done.  I don’t have to be fast, or go super far (although I DO love that).  I just needed to do SOMETHING.

Things have changed quite a lot in the past few years – mostly for the better.  I’ve made great progress on my dissertation research and am preparing for my Ph.D. defense this spring.  I actually ENJOY research now and think I do a pretty good job of it, which I never thought I would be able to say several years ago.  I’m living in a place I absolutely adore, with a person I adore.  And speaking of that person I adore, I’ve also gotten engaged and am getting married next summer.  It’s been pretty good!  So now it’s time to get myself back on track with my racing and training.

I’ve always struggled with consistency.  It’s been my biggest obstacle when it comes to training, and it’s one of the most important things.  So my main focus for the time being is just that – consistency.  I don’t seem to do well when I try to workout at the end of the day, because once I get home from work I go into lazy mode and there’s a slim chance I’ll actually stick to my training plan that day.  So morning workouts it is!  This is easier said than done, of course.  Often, when my alarm goes off at 5 am, I run to the other side of the room to shut it off, so I don’t wake up J, and then I immediately turn around and get back in bed.  IT’S JUST SO WARM AND COZY!  But once I get just ONE morning workout under my belt, it gets easier.  I feel so much more accomplished getting that done first thing in the morning, and I find that I get more work done throughout the course of the day too, because it puts me in a better place to be productive.  Funny how that works.

To go along with the consistency theme, I’m also hoping to get back into writing posts more often.  I enjoy writing as a creative outlet, and it also gives me some accountability on those days when I just don’t want to do anything.  It also helps me think out loud about what’s going well and not so well, and figure out ways to fix problems.  So that’s about it for now.  Until next time, internet!